Today as I muddled my way through yet another busy weekday I got to thinking. This elusive thing called motherhood was something that I strove for for almost four years. I waited, I longed, I hoped, I prayer to be a mother. I had all of the usual ideals about what it meant to be a Mom. It wasn't until I found myself pregnant with triplets that I actually gave any thought to the sleepless nights, worry and stress.
Now I am the mother of two (how in the hell that happened, I don't really know) with the usual stresses a mother experiences. Some days my infertility battles seem like light years ago and other days the wounds feel so fresh I can hardly catch my breath. In the midst of these stressful days of doctors appoints, physical therapy, temper tantrums and wild toddlers I don't have much time to consider the idea of being a "mommy". I guess a combination of too much stress and not enough sleep led me down this path today...
Motherhood is the only job that can be the best job you have ever had while also been the absolute worst. One minute I have two screaming toddlers, a bloody lip, poop on my hand and a million things to do. Then in the next breath one of my daughter hugs my leg and I forget about the stress, poop and blood (kinda like the blood, sweat and tears of motherhood :D ). Motherhood is the only job that can reward and limit you at the same time. It is the only undertaking that can truly make you laugh as hard as you can while crying hysterically all in one emotional blur. You can dance through exhaustion and smile through your fears. You can look at these helpless little people and know that you are the only thing standing between them and their own demise. Motherhood can make you feel limitlessly powerful and like a scared little girl.
In all my years of infertility, graduate school, being a poor newlywed and all the other stresses BK (before kids) I never experiences the mixed bag of emotions of being a parent. I would not wish this away for anything. I know how precious this time is. I understand that this is parenthood. This messy, emotional, exhausted state of mind is as it should be. That being said it doesn't make it an ounce easier to live through. I get up in the morning and start my day (huge coffee mug in hand) with an exhausted smile and I wouldn't trade any of it for the world.
Now that I have rambled on, making absolutely no sense for four paragraphs I should probably finish my work and get to bed... we have a soccer game in the morning. :D
Posts
3 comments:
Well said! I agree 100%, one-of-a-kind "job" with every degree of emotion. Thankfully kids are cute and they make you forget all the bad stuff. The "i love you's" really make it all worth while!
You made perfect sense to me. And I am right there with ya!
Wendy
Tantrums can be a real strain on parents and children. After years of observing and hearing about them, I wrote the "Temper Tantrum Common Sense Handbook" that lists plenty of ways to prevent, stop, and live with tantrums.
Although most children go through a tantrum stage when they have a vocabulary of about 100 or 200 words, some tantrums are caused by allergies. Whether it's an inhaled or consumed allergen, the child doesn't feel well, loses sleep, is irritable and ripe for the slightest thing to be upsetting enough to cause a tantrum. There are, obviously, countless other reasons for tantrums and then, no apparent reason (at least not a reasonable reason).
"Temper Tantrum Common Sense Handbook" also goes through the "be prepared" aspects of shopping, traveling, dining out, and other places that seem to be tantrum magnets.
The book is ideal for anyone -- parent, relative, daycare operator, teacher, flight attendant -- who deals with and loves children.
The book is available at www.TuffTurtle.com/tantrums.htm
Post a Comment