Life with Coco and Gigi... and Jack-Jack too!

Life as a Mom, A Homesteader, A Blogger and A Wife.

Pointing Fingers

I saw this on a friends blog and thought it was worth sharing with you all:

Pointing fingers...
Why Doesn't She Just…?

Written by Michelle

finger pointing

See her?

That mom over there?

Why doesn't she just…

…Leave her baby in the nursery at church?
…Give it a rest with the hand sanitizer?
…Breastfeed?

Or that one — right over there — why doesn't she just…

…Make her child behave?
…Stay home?
…Get a sitter?

What about that one — why doesn't she just…

…Stop trying to put her child in with the "normal" kids?

Because she cannot — because she knows the nursery won't pay close enough attention to her baby's allergies, because her baby has reflux so severe it would break your heart if you really knew, because her baby has a skin condition and people say and think the cruelest things when they get a close look, because she's the only one that knows how to care for her baby's trach, g-tube, medical condition — she and her family are the only ones who are able.

Because she knows it's worth the risk of offending someone by offering a bottle of hand sanitizer. Because she knows that her baby is only one well-meant cuddle away from another three-month stay in the NICU.

Because breastfeeding isn't always as simple as it sounds. Because hours and hours of sleepless nights and stressful tears while her child's life hung in the balance have ravaged her body to the point that it has nothing more it can give — no matter how much she wishes it were otherwise. Because the dream of nursing her own child died while her baby struggled to survive with the help of ventilators, trachs, feeding tubes. Because she won a hard fight against breast cancer. Because her child cannot or will not eat, leaving her to plan for future therapy, the next surgery, the next specialist appointment — while she searches for answers, diagnoses, treatments.

Because bad behavior isn't always synonymous with bad parenting or spoiled children. Because she's doing the best job possible in a challenging set of circumstances. Because her child has autism, asperger's, touertte's, down syndrome, schizophrenia, fetal alcohol syndrome — and after a full day of doctor and therapy appointments the stop at the grocery store just wasn't optional — much as she wishes that it was. Because you just happen to be seeing her on one of the very worst days of her life.

Because she's already stayed home for months. Because she deserves fresh air as much as the next person. Because her child does too. Because she's working hard to give her child as many normal experiences as possible. Because others need to learn to be compassionate.

Because the possibility of a sitter isn't a reality for everyone. Because she and her family are the only ones who know — the only ones who know how to calm her child down, how to give the injections, how to get her child to eat, what to do if her child seizes, how to vent her child's G-tube, how to run her child's feeding pump, how to flush her child's port, how to change her child's trach, how to assist her child to the bathroom, how to tell when it's time to take her child to the ER or just time for a nap, she and her family are the only ones who know how to keep her child safe.

Because her child deserves a little bit of "normal" in this life too. Because her child, like every child deserves the best that can be given them. Because she sees the child when others see a disability. Because her child matters.

Because she's right to teach her child to try, to aspire, to dream.

"Stolen" from The Fish Tank

3 comments:

Nichole 9:37 AM  

Thank you for sharing this with us... It has opened my eyes to the reality of the struggles that mothers try to overcome everyday...

Anonymous 5:43 PM  

Thank you so much for sharing this. My child does not necessarily have a disability, but he is hyperactive and hard to control despite my best efforts. This says it perfectly--sometimes we have to get out of the house, and we don't really need strangers' dirty looks when we're doing the best we can.

Kristen 8:06 PM  

This served as a great reminder that when that Mom in the grocery store gives in and gives her kid the lolly pop there might be a reason beyond her being a lax mother.

Us

Us

About this blog

Over 8 years we have struggled through 3 IUI's, 6 rounds of IVF, several RE's, hundreds of appointments and the loss of three little angels. Now we find ourselves the proud parents of two perfect little girls and a wonderful little boy!!

Both of our girls struggle with some disabilities but that won't keep us down. Each day has it's own brand of insanity but we love it. Most days I am more monkey wrangler than mother but I do the best I can. Todays goal - getting to tomorrow.

Search This Blog

Follow us through pictures!

Follow us through pictures!
kristenfescoe

GFAF Blogger

GFAF Blogger

Followers

Blog Archive

There was an error in this gadget
© 2006–2015. Life with Coco and Gigi. All rights reserved. No content on this site may be reused in any fashion without written permission.

Labels

50 Things to Blog About (1) A Bright Project (1) Abb (1) Abby (188) ADHD (2) Adventures in Therapy (25) Allergies (9) Allergy Friendly (4) Asian Recipes (2) Babies (29) Baby (6) Baby Stuff (29) Baby Updates (83) Back to school (4) Backyard (1) Backyard 2013 (2) Baking (1) Beef Recipes (5) Being Three (5) Blog Challenge (30) Blogs (25) Breakfast Recipes (1) Breast Feeding (8) Brian (5) Cancer (11) Canning (5) Catching Up (1) Charity (3) Chicken (2) Chicken Recipe (6) CHOP (43) Christmas (11) Clean Eating (1) Cook Books (2) Cooking (24) Coupons (4) Crafts (2) Crock Pot Recipe (3) Dad (10) Dairy Free (2) Dance (1) Delivery (3) Dessert Recipe (1) Disney (2) DIY (1) Doctors Appointments (100) Dog (3) Down the shore (4) Easy Meals (2) EI (22) Family (183) Father and son (1) Five Ingredient Favorites (2) Food (3) Food Allergies (2) Freezing (1) Funny (2) Garden 2013 (4) Gardening (9) Girls (220) Giveaway (17) Gluten Free (2) Grace (1) Gracie (138) Gratitude Journal (8) Grilling (1) Guest Post (1) Holidays (118) Home buying (24) Homemade (3) Homesteading (2) How we spend our time (120) Illness (67) In The Kitchen (19) In the yard (1) Infertility (59) Inspired writing (5) Instagram (1) Issues for women like me (76) IVF (28) Jack (88) Kindness (1) Library (2) Living Simply (1) Me (131) Meatless Recipes (1) Mexican (1) Mexican Recipes (2) Misc (55) Mom Thoughts (76) Moments (1) Momma Woes (1) Mothering (8) Mushrooms (1) My annoying hand (12) Nursery (5) Nursing (7) OT (12) Our House (28) Parenting (54) Pasta (2) Phone Dump (1) Pictures (532) Politics (5) Pork Recipes (1) Potty Training (6) Prayer Request (8) Pregnancy (118) Pregnancy Loss (3) Preserving (5) PT (31) Quotes (11) Randomness (143) Rant (52) Recipes (25) Reviews (1) Rhombencephalosynapsis (11) School (87) Seafood Recipe (1) Sensory Integration (13) Shower (2) Siblings (2) Side Dishes (1) Snack Recipes (1) Soup (5) Special Needs (11) Speech (4) Sponsored Posts (1) Sports (94) Stew (1) stories (1) Summer Fun (11) Summer Learning (6) Summer Meals (1) The Girls (3) The Kids (40) The Reason for the season (1) The Reason for the Season (25) Therapy (5) Things my kids always eat (11) Time Savers (1) Topics of Interest (13) Track (9) Twins (51) Ultrasounds (4) Vacation (35) Vegan (4) Vegan Recipes (1) Veggie Recipes (1) Video (77) Videos (28) WAHM (1) Website (2) Weekly Updates (29) Weight Loss (2) What to do with leftovers (1) Winter (4) Wisdom the Dog (3) Words of inspiration (8) Work (12) Writing (6) Writing Pieces (1) Yo Gabba Gabba (3)