Life with Coco and Gigi... and Jack-Jack too!

Life as a Mom, A Homesteader, A Blogger and A Wife.

A hard day stays hard

Our day didn't do much in terms of getting better. Both girls were a mess all afternoon. They were exhausted but too stressed to get any good rest. I finally got them down for a nap and within an hour Grace was screaming (from a nightmare) "I want to go home". Every time we have tried to talk about school she starts to cry. I know it's going to be hard for a while but it is something that we have to do.

In terms of whether to consider (at some point) removing them from the program... it's almost as if we don't have a choice. We obviously do, we are the parents. But our kids could not get the services this program offers anywhere else. They are some of the best services in the state if not better. In all honesty... I HATE this whole damn thing. I put on a brave face and smile but it SUCKS!

Nothing in our experience as parents has been "normal"... NOT A DAMN THING. It is so frustrating. After the past three years of doctors, specialists, surgery, tests, therapy and on and on we can't even have a normal experience for preschool. I WANT to drop my kids in beautiful dresses at the local church preschool for two hours twice a week. I want to put bows in their hair and adorable shoes on their feet. Instead I have to dress them in clothes they can do therapy in and haul them screaming to a bus-stop because I KNOW IT'S WHAT'S BEST FOR THEM.

What's that song lyric... "Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."

Please pray for a happier day three!

4 comments:

Anonymous 11:39 PM  

well, rest assured you are still dressing them in adorable outfits!

melbournebound 4:43 AM  

You are doing such a good job and you are a great mom! Hang in there, I will hope and pray that it gets better for you and them ASAP!

Stefanie 11:19 AM  

Hope it gets better for you.
Is there any reason that you can't drop them off at school? Even stay with them for a day or two. It would probably make it easier if they were able to gradually transition away from you. It would probably be easier on you too!

Kristen 11:23 AM  

S - They don't let parents stay except for certain set days out of the year. I have thought a lot about dropping them at school but here is my rationale. Right now they leave me. I stand and smile and wave and stay home. They know I will be here when they get back. If I drop them they will have to watch me walk/drive away. I feel like that might feel like a greater abandonment.

KWIM? I am probably over analyzing but I have thought a ton about it.

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Over 8 years we have struggled through 3 IUI's, 6 rounds of IVF, several RE's, hundreds of appointments and the loss of three little angels. Now we find ourselves the proud parents of two perfect little girls and a wonderful little boy!!

Both of our girls struggle with some disabilities but that won't keep us down. Each day has it's own brand of insanity but we love it. Most days I am more monkey wrangler than mother but I do the best I can. Todays goal - getting to tomorrow.

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